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About fight against yourself and victory. Or defeat.
May 31, 2018 5 years agoAny kind of martial arts supposes the highest concentration of attention. Everything must be directed “contra”. But it is not too hard, because you clearly see the opponent in front of you, you know that he is your enemy for only a couple of minutes, until the round ends or someone in a street fight understands that luck is not on his side. It is much more difficult to fight yourself. The enemy is not so simple, he knows all your weak points and can press on it. If your Alter Ego knows about your self-esteem, it will give you the thought that some event, beneficial to him, will lift you to incredible heights. And it is also about any vice that is somewhere in the depths of your soul. To fight against yourself is very difficult. Choose between want and need, do it for yourself or for everyone. You trying all known methods: guessing at the coffee, spreading out solitaires, writing a list of pros and cons. If the decision is not made immediately, if there is a choice, the case takes a very bad turn. The seed of doubt grows into the whole jungle in which you wander, trying to find the path with the least loss and moreover with the greatest benefit for yourself. When the consciousness is finally lost in the thickets, which are already higher than you, you understand that it is only a chance can solve this problem. And there remains only the old way, allowing to write off everything for the tricks of fate - to throw a coin, knowing that it will not fall exactly on the edge and stop the infinite thinking of all the parties to the choice. It is impossible to fight against yourself. Because when you have already thrown a coin, you know which result you want see. It happens that a person finds the meaning of life in one moment. More often, this is every-minute desire to change your state. Just immediately become a different person, change your environment or, most likely, yourself. And it does not matter whether it's a goal that can be accomplished in five minutes or two hours, or what you need to dedicate your whole life. In this point you understand why you living. Cardinally nothing is changed, you also brush your teeth in the morning, go to classes. But you do all this things with the thought that this is someone (you) need, that every even unnecessary action takes you a little step closer to the goal. Ordinary and sometimes strange things acquire a mysterious meaning. And the most important is that you have the belief that all this is not in vain. And this great and all-encompassing "Not in vain" hangs somewhere above you and does not give any doubt to the expediency of everything done. In addition, the duties of a new, created deity "Not in vain" include reminders that if you not move, a miracle will not happen. Nothing will happen. And this motivates you more than the appeals of all the centuries-old gods to goodness, humility and forgiveness. Just at one point, you realize that it's necessary. To you. To the whole world. It happens that a person finds the meaning of life in one moment. It happens that in one moment loses. And loses himself as a bonus.
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