My Heart in December

(4.12.2019) So winter is finally here! Back December again! Everyone seems to be so excited about it. The last month of the year is now here, and it is almost time for snow and Christmas celebration. To many people, it is probably the most beautiful and exciting time of the year since there are many pretty things to enjoy. Wah, It was just a 5 pm evening, yet it was dark like 10 pm. Days become shorter. I only have 2 more last weeks of classes for this semester! Time flies! I was walking to the bus stop from my school back to the dormitory. It was a cold season, no wonder why I was having so many layers of clothes. My bag was damn heavy since I just borrowed some thick books from the library. Of course, when it comes to Christmas, I thought of those final exams that are happily calling me. I was feeling so relieved after finishing those 2 presentations for today's class, since one of them was in the Czech language, and that one made me nervous since yesterday. Now I was finally done with school for today! I could not resist the beauty of the sky as I was on the way. Although it felt like 1 degree outside, I still love to take out my phone, capturing that sunset view. Check it out on my IG if you want to see!! On the bus, I was sitting on an empty seat for two people near the window, taking a good short rest while looking out at the city views. It usually takes me 15mn to arrive at the dormitory. I put on my headphone, playing “the house that built me” by Miranda Lambert. My eyes were caught with those small houses along the way which have already started lighting their Christmas tree and decorating their house. Those colorful, blinks and bright lights brought up my mood. Only Snow is missing, and it should be falling sometimes next week. Christmas lights and snows are perfectly matched. Those small lamps that usually lights up the road at night are probably no longer needed; those brighting pretty decorations of each house along the way are enough to lead everyone home. I was thinking to myself while seeing these. It reminds me of my house where I could always see these kinds of decorations on new year day. I remember mom putting those pretty lights on the front table, making a home even more beautiful at night. Anyway, I know my little brother would not stop messing up, not even the most beautiful things. Whether it is Christmas or new year, I miss those family gatherings, little talks, loud karaoke, and those sweet and funny conversations with mom and dad. While thinking of these, something came up to my ear “……If I could touch this place or feel it, the brokenness inside me might start healing, out here it's like I'm someone else, thought that maybe I could find myself……” It was my favorite lyrics! This feeling is so good, romantics, and sad. I wish after school I could arrive home just like others, seeing my family, eating mom's food, and hugging her as long as I can. I do wish for that. I wonder how they are doing. Imagine if one of those small houses is my family, imagine this is where I originally belong to, and imagine that tonight we are going to have a warm nice family dinner together despite the cold weather, this makes me feel so complete and warm. Can't wait to see you again, home. Make sure you make time for home dinner. Sending my love and misses to my family and everyone who is reading this!! Happy early merry Christmas, and happy new year

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