I'm sorry

I'm only 15. How did this all happen. Why is my life so hard right now. I'm sorry. I hurt people. They just were being jerks and I couldn't control myself. No wonder on how I am fighting my wishes to commit suicide. I'm not even sure if it ever will happen or not. Only time will tell. Jayson... I'm sorry. Not much to say, just, I'm sorry your a b!tchy @ss f#cking betrayer who kept cheating and ignoring me. I'm glad that we ended when we did. I'm sorry that I didn't realize it sooner and end things sooner. Enjoy hell. Jemsen... I'm sorry. We had just met and we were rushing things to far. I was thinking the same thing when you said you wanted to just stay friends and see where we would go from there. Alex... I'm sorry. I know you broke up with me, I know you did lie about you loving me. You could have still rejected me when I asked you will you be my boyfriend. Yet you said yes, I am sorry for all the pressure I put on you... Jemsen... I'm sorry. You did love me but, they died. The feelings we had are gone. And forevermore they will be. We met just 2 years ago on February 26, 2020. I am grateful to have an amazing best friend like you in my life. Ian... I'm sorry. You ditched me, but, I broke up with you because you treated me badly which caused me to become the way I am now. I am sorry for hurting you, but I am only feeling sorry because I gave revenge for what you had done to me... You will never have a place in my life ever again. Jemsen... I'm sorry. You did ask me to do the worst things possible. Asked me uncomfortable questions. Tried to see my body. I have no regrets telling you to stop. But you have no idea how many nights I cried myself and never even slept because of you. Lennon... I'm sorry. Your my best friend Lennon. I had no intentions of breaking your heart when we had just started but, it was only very soon after a break up that we happened and I needed time to myself. I thought of you more as my brother and best friend than as a boyfriend. I am so sorry. Jemsen... I'm sorry. You and I are in different schools. I'm going somewhere else then where you are at right now. So it was reasonable that it ended. Were still good friends at least. Ali... I'm sorry. Your the one who I love the most. Out of everyone I have ever dated. You were my one and only queen. You ruled my heart. No one would ever replace you in my life. Your like none other. But, I kissed someone else, my own best friend and I broke up with you because of me avoiding me messing up again and your dad is homophobic. I am sorry for messing up.

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