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T_Vorlak

IT ‘S NOT TOO LATE TO WRITE YOUR STRORY❤️️

Phnom Penh , Cambodia

Hey ! I am Vorlak. I am a senior student of Department of International Business Management, Rupp, Cambodia. Meanwhile, I am working as a Graphic Designer and freelance content writer.

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What I Learned from Living Alone

Mar 22, 2021 1 month ago

I have lived solo on and off over a handful of my adulthood years, and currently am the queen of my own fort. Living alone has allowed me to learn so much about myself, as well as the world I live in, which is why I believe everyone should live alone at least once in their lifetime. living alone gave me a sense of independence I never had prior. I was no longer the only child who needed my mom and dad to run to the rescue. I discovered that living alone allowed me to grow into a person I needed and wanted to become. That 's the beauty in living alone for a period of time, It feels like I give myself the space and room to grow. Thus, bellow are the things I learned from living alone almost 5 years. 1. Believe it or not ? Learn How to stand on my own feet. When I am living alone, I learn how to stand on my own feet with confidence. It alters my state of mind and I am no longer dependent on anyone else, financially or emotionally. This independence others can not only see it, but I feel it, and be inspired by it. 2. I take full responsibility for my life ; Solo living makes me the most accountable I 've ever been, and this is so important. In life it 's easy to push blame towards someone else, I know, I ' ve been there pointing fingers at anyone but myself. But when I live alone, there is no one to blame when the dishes are piling up , the laundry did not get done. To become accountable is truly liberating, because I learn to take responsibility for my life, and that is called power. And this newfound power will pour into not only my personal life, but it will contribute into my professional life too. 3. Figure out how to deal with that loneliness; Nah! It's okay to feel lonely. When I first felt lonely on my own, I began worry that It was a bad feeling, and I shouldn't feel so alone. The truth is , it's completely fine to feel this way. I'm a selective social person. so, when I'm alone for more than an afternoon. I feel like I want to chit chat with my only few friends . To combat any loneliness, I would often watch anime, read book or playing music instruments. These are the ways that I use to deal with my loneliness. So It is okay to feel lonely.

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“There are some words to keep silence. Waiting for the best time to say it out. Let him know. Stay try , stay do it in many ways. Long time gone for him. Let him feel it. But the more I do, the more he really doesn't care. The more I do, the more in doubt in my heart is a loud silent inside. Do u never ever feel it ? Never ever hear it ? The inside voice shouting that “ I love you “ always keep it inside to myself.” I stay up late at night, doing my thesis and always listening to this thai song which i ‘ve translated it above. The lyrics truly fit with my situation. I listen to it every night to keep encourage me in the sense of one_sided lover that “I will get his heart, or probably he increasingly had me in his also” it's sound like crazy imagintation right ? Frankly, it was my tiny happiness. Until one day , I ‘ve commit to myself to write him a confessions letter. What's more, I wrote a bit long letter to express my true feeling from inside my broken , uncertainty heart. I do know we are just friends and probably he doesn't like me in return.But, at least I have tried to do something I can't even expect to do once in my life time. So What is that ? No doubt , it is my confessions toward him. I brought out of my inner courage to sent him that letter that I spent almost 2 hours to completed. First, I felt hopeful that he gonna reply me back with what have been existed in his mind. Instead of feeling awkwardly , I chose to pull myself together to put all of my thought under control. I am done prepared both emotionally and intellectually to react and accept all of those piece of things. Yup, am done ! Guess, what ‘s next ? I've been waited for him to reply me back with the nervous crazy feeling in my stomach and fluctuate heartbeat almost one day up until now. Does he really care about me ? Probably No way. Nah, am even feel regret to sent him that letter because I don ‘t wanna make things go wrong between us. We used to be a close friends. If things go wrong, it all about because of me; who is the one destroying the entire friendship. YEAH! at the same time, I am slowly tired , fed up, feel stupid, feel not even his choice or his special person. I now realized that all of those butterflies and expectation I have felt, Personally, I felt and sense it alone. Life won't get hurt or much dissatisfy, if I expect nothing. I always tell myself, and i don't know why i still repeating the same mistake and end up hurting myself even more. There are things that we don't want to happen but have to accept, things we don't want to know but have to learn and people we cannot live without, but have to let go. Life is not about want you to stay suck with the problem, sadness, heartbroken. Intellectually, Life is a game to tested how strong and smart u are to get over those painful things. People always think the most painful thing is to lose someone you love. In truth, the most painful thing is to lose YOURSELF, and not even realize it is too late. Hence, i completely decided to take it easy. Give myself some slack from this one_sided love 😌. To love myself harder, I won't make this young love take over my maturity instead of my value time to kick ass and getting my responsonsibilities done. Anyways, I am totally thankful to him ( my crush ) who teachs me courage, break-brave to reveal the silence loudest inside my heart. I essentially did it well, Thanks.🙏🙏🙏

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As being twenties, it is the best time of our lives to go out exploring new things and meeting new people. Because being young, you believe the world is yours. You feel like you can do whatever you want. You can date whoever you like. Even if things aren't turning in the way we've expected or we are falling down with lives, we are still have plenty of time to stand up and enjoy getting to know these temporary people again. You may say i'm done with yourself, but trust me you are not. You aren't done until you meet someone or you aren't too young to joking with your life anymore. - Not only about a relationship, but also everyone. If i write down all of the person i've meet during my first three years at university, the paper would probably being so long. Some i never speak again and some i never met again. I guess time help us realise what do we really want in a person. And if we don't look like what they have thought or they don't meet our expectations, it is so okay to walk away from each other life. We don't need to hate each other for that. (HATE is what childish people do!) - The more you grow up, the more you learn that you don't need to keep everyone in life. Only a person who loves you worth keeping to remember and that's so enough. You get sick and tired of pleasing everyone eventually. As they aren't appreciate you like you did to them. I went to not a very big IT(Information technology ) institute in Cambodia. We only had between 20-25 students per class and i was a graphic design student at that time. But believe it or not, after graduated, i still keep in touch to not more than 5 people. For others, i still see them appear on my Facebook feed. Only 5 i have made a real conversation with. You will see, spending so many months in school together didn't prove anything. Even a long-last friend could turn out to be a total stranger, no doubt a temporary people during twenties could end up being the same too. People can easily come and easily go. Perhaps you will think, so why the hell do i have to let them in?The truth is you have no choice because you will never know either they decide to stay or walk away. So it is your job not to set a very high expectation from anyone. Then you won't be crying all night long if you found out they walk into your memories for just a short time. Actually they are the one who've lost, they just let go of the chance of being with anyone so cool like you 🙂☹️ It's true during twenties you will meet a lot of temporary people. But only if i had a choice (or am i allowing to having a choice), I wish they could stay. I truly wish i don't have to let somebody goes. It should be easy for us right? We are still young and probably have to face a lot more heart broken in life. But seriously who wants that. 🙂🙂😌

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Read This when you lack motivation to go on!!! #When you lack motivation to go on, you doubt everything. you may not realize it, but the way you view your worth changes. you may question what you are doing, whether it be your studies, your careers, or your life choices. you may be questioning your worth- does a failure like me deserve to be friend with someone as smart as him or her, do they actually care or am I just a piece in this game of life? #I know you probably know these voices are telling you lies. but when you lack the motivation to go on, these doubts becomes louder than the voice of the truth. #When you are lack of motivation to go on, you find yourself giving into your emotional more. you question your strength when you saccumb to your stresses, to your breakdowns, to your tears, you find yourself feeling more distracted and losing your concentration easily. #when you lack the motivation to go on, you sometimes find yourself feeling numb, you find yourself losing control. whether it being your eating habits or your discipline in committing to your responsibilities. I know you find yourself procrastinating as much as you can and as long as you used to love. #And I'm here to tell you that it' okay. It's okay that you may feel like this for a while.But when you lack the motivation to go on, know that you will get up again. #when you lack the motivation to go on, know what it won't be permanent unless you allow it to be. you will get up again because you are stronger than you think you are. you will get up again, just like before. When you lack the motivation to go on, know that this does not reflect on your worth. I promise, there will be better days and better moments ahead.

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Because life is always difficult, no matter you are in your early 20's or late 30's. I guess it is no different. Life is hard anyway. Depending on how you handle it. If you handle it well, congratulations. But if you handle it wrong. It is just another quarter of life you need to get through. I just turn 20 recently, I finally almost graduated and got job after I've been drowning in confusion and lost what to do with my life. I am not saying that my life is going good so far. There's someday I cried without any reason.There‘s also day I was extremely happy. And there ‘s a day I woke up feeling empty and couldn't find answer for whatever I was looking for. I know I am still young. There's probably a lot in life I need to figure it out. Who said when you graduate, Your learning curve will stop just right there. So here is the things I have learnt and figured it out so far. Things I wish somebody tells me a bit sooner so my early twenties won't be this hurt. Travelling more before you get trapped with your job.😊 That is why they said gap year is important for those who can't seem to figure out what do they want to do with their life and I believe that is so true. You probably don't wanna spend 8-5 everyday doing what you hate. For those who finally figure out your career path, congratulations. And for those who still have no idea, whatever you are doing right now, stop it, pack your bag and leave. Hah ha. No matter how much I earn, it does not seem to be enough😌😌😌 I wish they teach you more in school about managing your financial status. Every one probably wish to have a credit card to spend on all whatever they want. But not everyone knows how to manage it properly. Ever since I got a job and finally earn money of my own, I feel so damn poor. I seriously have no idea how I handle it as a student. As a jobber, I can't even afford a nice dinner meal with friends. We meet up at CJCC and talk about how bad we are at spending money. So why were I was so rich before but so poor now? The truth is I am neither rich or broke. It was just back then I have my family and scholarship to support me. Right now, everything depends on my own wallet. All depends on my own. If I still can't figure out how to manage my saving properly, no matter how much I earn does not seem to be enough. Do not see things only black and white, because life has so many colours in it.😊 I used to get upset easily when thing does not go as the way I was expected. I blamed myself all the time what I did wrong and how can I fix it. But the truth is maybe I don't have to fix it. Maybe all I need is to observe and learn. Because there‘s not only black and white. If I made it wrong. I don't even need to fix it right. I was being straightforward with everything and it‘s killing me. Life can be more flexible with so many colours in it. Just open your eyes, you are not made to see black and white. And remember life with only black and white is never beautiful. Mistakes can also give you a colorful vibe and joy.

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