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Life for me is a journey of discoveries, and I'm intent on exploring all the myriad shades of it - I think, presently, this is who I am
I know love that it may have crossed your mind why I suddendly became laid back and taciturn toward you. Please be assured in your belief that my decision is not hinged on any wrong you've done, actual or perceived. Truth is for a while I was in a strait betwixt as to what course to take - a dilemma of sorts. On the one hand I feel that playing my cards against my chest may paint the picture of an immature response from me in not having the courage to state a cause (this will be far from the truth). On the other hand I feel that stating a cause may translate into exerting a certain pressure on your heart (pressure which may be construed as underhand and deigning - an outcome that is never my intention). Hence I stood the risk of you either construing my actions as imature or perceiving me as condescending - I think I can live with your conceptions of me as immature. But again for fear of besmirching the remaining vestiges of whatever esteem you may have of me, I now make this write albeit with every attempt to obfuscate meaning through my superfluous employments of verbosity. I've come to understand that sometimes when we think we stand on the fringes to see how the cat jumps, we unawares have made up our minds on what path to tow. I'm also not unaware of the fluctuations of human will - something I scarce will pith myself against no matter what ideals of my own I may hold. I hence believe that somethings best be left unspoken between us as life must move on. I will however always treasure you, all that you stand for and what you mean to me. My present volte face may not change soon. Even now I perceive that with my many words I pander towards dilemma 2. I know you understand love. You'll ever be dear to me
I knew of a bloke and lass once. They both were members of a certain small group. They'll hold hands as if there was something passing from one to the other. They'll stare into each other's eyes as if there were images there only seen by them twain and none else. Daily they'll lock hands in everlasting embrace like newly reacquainted pals. And they never called themselves lovers. Weird romance! Yes I remember that guy was gauche and inexperienced in abstruse matters of love. What would you have a bloke do who never envisaged this tsunami that rocked his life's boat so? This much was true of him - that he really loved her deeply, intensely and profoundly. He says he still loves her. Wonders indeed never end; this one may have just began
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