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gorgeousme

THE 18 ROSES OF MY LIFE

Aug 30, 2018 5 years ago

When I was as innocent as a child, times when I just knew the whats of life not the hows, I was taught to believe that love is something that cannot be taught but it can be learned. It was my father who educated me that; the first rose on my most remarkable dance. The moment he stood across me wearing a splendid smile, the music then started. “I found a love for me... Darling just dive right in and follow my lead…” He wrapped his arms around me, a fatherly-hugged, stepping to the right then to the left. I felt the comfort like the universe is with me as he whispered to me, “Happy Birthday!” My happiness was in the state of being exorbitant that my tears were about to flow ceaselessly. “Well I found a girl beautiful and sweet…” My father let go of me when I noticed a boy whom I failed to see for almost 3 years; my closest cousin. He handed me the second rose. “I never knew you were the someone waiting for me... 'Cause we were just kids when we fell in love…” After, was the boy whom I thought to be the “someone” who'll fulfill the identity of my dream boy I am with in my every night's dreams; my childhood boy best friend. He twirled me, faced me in the direction where he's facing, then back-hugged me, holding both of my hands while dancing as the music continued. After greeting me, he gave me the 3rd rose. He smiled purely at me then handed my right hand to the next boy waiting for me. “Not knowing what it was... I will not give you up this time…” There, when thoughts made its existence into my blank mind, the boy that I was about to dance is the boy who first confessed on me and the boy who had first felt the heaviness of my palm. It was an awkward silence until he tapped my head gently; there he broke the creepiness I felt as we followed the beat, saying his short greetings then gave me the fourth rose. The music was still on its highest volume. “Who's next?” I mouthed. Then I heard a whisper behind me. As I checked on it, he was he: my first love, and my first heartbreak. He whom I thought perfectly made me in believing that loyalty and forever do exits. But life is so much more than what I studied. Every beat of my heart was for me is a curse. But everything was just a part of my buried past. “But darling, just kiss me slow, your heart is all I own... And in your eyes you're holding mine…” I am in the middle of reminiscing till he brought me back to where I was – standing very closed to him. He did slide his hand touching my forehead, to my cheeks, and then about to touch my chin but rather, he stopped at my cheeks then surprisingly, he did it again: he pressed my nose, and then spoke “you've changed a lot”. Afterwards, he gave me the 5th rose. “Baby, I'm dancing in the dark with you between my arms... Barefoot on the grass, listening to our favorite song... When you said you looked a mess, I whispered underneath my breath... But you heard it, darling, you look perfect tonight…” After him, the 6th to 14th roses were in my 9 closest boy best friends. 7 from the boys I had met way back before and 2 from the boys I met currently. Minutes had passed; I had overcome more than the half of the whole. As I counted my roses, it's the time for the 15th one to be in my precious hands. “Well I found a woman, stronger than anyone I know... She shares my dreams, I hope that someday I'll share her home... I found a love, to carry more than just my secrets... To carry love, to carry children of our own... We are still kids, but we're so in love... Fighting against all odds…” This time, I've seen the most familiar figure from afar. The rhythm of the music was awesomely complementing his way of walking. He's indeed a dancer. As he got closer to me I felt unease. Should I smile? He was my fresh heartache though. Despite all, I continued the dance. Our time was shortened, everything didn't last. “I know we'll be alright this time... Darling, just hold my hand... Be my girl, I'll be your man... I see my future in your eyes…” Next face I saw belonged to a guy whom I repeatedly busted. I felt ashamed mixed with a little bit of joy for he showed in my day. It was a simple dance for we had formed nothing but only a kind of suitor and a courted girl relationship, nothing's special. He gave me the 16th rose. The song never stopped to continue. I've then noticed my 2nd closest cousin, a kiddo, who went running all the way towards me bringing with him my 17th rose. Again, that didn't take us long enough. “Baby, I'm dancing in the dark, with you between my arms... Barefoot on the grass, listening to our favorite song... I have faith in what I see... Now I know I have met an angel in person...And she looks perfect, I don't deserve this... You look perfect tonight…” The 18th rose? I saved my 18th rose. No one is capable and worthy enough for my last dance. It will be mine until someone will present himself as my "the one". The music stopped. I opened my eyes. How I wished that everything I imagined will soon be happened.

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