Barotov Hojiakbar

Eager Learner

Angren, Uzbekistan

Barotov Hojiakbar is currently a high-school senior, taking courses in Math, Coding, and Management. He is well acquainted with technology and economics. He also likes to read scientific and analytical articles, as well as a wide range of books. '1984' and 'Animal Farm' are his favorite novels.

His past-time activities consist of playing chess, volunteering to create designs for volunteer organizations, and working in his garden. He is fond of discussions and debates as well

How fear may make you stronger

Oct 21, 2021 2 years ago

Selfish. Stubborn. Lazy. These characteristics were what people used to think about me until just one year ago. I was just an ordinary teenager struggling to find my place in life. However, the pandemic changed everything completely. In March of 2020, the COVID-19 hit my country of Uzbekistan, affecting jobs, education, and the common welfare like everywhere else. My parents went out of their jobs, with little money left for the coming months. In those dark and lean times, I couldn't go to private lessons, spend so much as I had had, and help worrying about my future. In order to survive, we all had to do hard work on a farm nearby all day long. That period lasted for three months, and I did nothing but started to learn my lesson and the ropes. Consequently, I realized that many jobs, including that in farmland, are permanently under threat thanks to the technology, and that I could no longer depend on my parents. Education was the only remaining choice. I was then 16. Before the disaster, I had done some English lessons and then decided to achieve an English Proficiency Certificate, IELTS for my future prospects. All the resources that I possessed - all of a sudden - became valuable. I was really in fear, lacking self-confidence, finding countless excuses for my laziness. This was probably because others' opinions of me and my studies affected me, and I had left a bad taste in their mouths. You have probably guessed; they had a bad influence on me. Yet, the virus and its impacts kept reminding me about what I was trying to achieve as well as to avoid. No one normally wants to be poor and uneducated, which prevents them from leading a healthy and comfortable life. That was what made me keep going at the time. Little by little, I managed to overcome those problems and began making improvements. It seemed quite necessary to learn - for higher education - a whole range of new skills: public speaking, computer tools, programming, and many others I had not tried or known before. I questioned myself for the first time: what I was doing in life, why I was doing it, and of course what was the meaning of my existence. Reading books, especially psychology ones, was my another daily habit soon to answer the all-important questions. Challenges and difficulties always stood in my way; for example, not only did I frequently failed to keep fit and well because of too much pressure, but I also gave up the idea that I could equally make progress in all activities I had chosen. The two problems taught how to be flexible and take the decision based on the situation. However, the pandemic still worried me sick. Time passed. I realized that I am a human-being, full of dreams and purposes in my own life. And that once we die, we should probably do nothing but leave good memories and deeds. By the way, I had achieved one of my goals, IELTS 7.5 by that time. Following this, I did my best to help my friends and peers in this language test. I have been following another set of dreams, ranging from studying abroad to working in my dream job: computer programming since then. All of these may have resulted from the process I underwent ,along with, the books that shaped my mindset. I am now a completely different person, compared to a nervous, egoistic teenager. Life is precious. The pandemic definitely made irreversible loss of life, together with, damage to our emotional state. It was the critical point for us all in the meantime. Of course, there are a million ways of making changes to your life, some of which include motivation, fear, and duty. I didn't know the exact reason behind my efforts, but it was certain that I did them all out of fear of being miserable, poor, and useless.

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